That’s right move over Taco Tuesday, a new cultural appropriation restrictive diet based day is here. Takoyaki Thursday! Okay maybe not, I mean. It’s fried octopus balls. So why is this a Couch Crunch article? It’s because they come frozen as well. The traditional Osakan street food. The classic Japanese festival snack. The frozen isle gaming snack? Well let’s see about that.

Fresh from my local import store’s deep freezer we have a jumbo sized 18 count bag of frozen octopus poppers. Thankfully the company that imports these slaps a big ol’ sticker on the back to tell me how to heat them up. 5 at a time, uncovered, and for 4 minutes.

The look and smell is on par with what I expect. I’ve had takoyaki before at this Osakan grill in Cincinnati. I don’t get down there often, but it’s the kind of flavor you don’t easily forget. It’s close to okonomiyaki in taste and texture. Just more simple, but I’m getting ahead of myself here. So the smell is amazing as they warm up. Much like any of those restaurant take home frozen appetizers smell can often be the only decent part of the meal. Microwaved octopus does not exactly make me feel… optimistic. 🐙

Typically they use wooden toothpicks, but I have all these olive tines that I have zero use for since I don’t make gin cocktails. The bag didn’t say wait. Should wait. It pops out kinda ooey gooey in a bit good way. Give it a few minutes and it will firm up to a nice firm ball. Reinflating is an odd trick, but it works. Plus it holds the pick in place even better after it plumps up. The best way to describe the texture is kinda like reverse chicken and dumplings.

Crispy skin, spongy body, and a creamy core all stuffed with octopus and veggies. No fancy drizzle or toppings included with these guys. So don’t get to excited.

The taste is better than expected. Not gonna lie went into this nervous as all hell that it would be awful. Good bounce, nice steamy gooey filling, with plenty if octopus chunks. Now there is one complaint. The octopus came out a little rough and over cooked. Kinda to be expected since it got cooked 3 times at this point. Which could be a plus for some people, especially those not used to octopus. It made the meat have a harder more flakey texture than octopus normally gets. Taste though, spot on. Think light hint of fresh turkey with a heavy dash of tilapia. The dough, batter, ball thing had a heavy lean into onion territory. Hints if kelp kept me going back. All with the sauce baked into the skin. All around not bad. A fair yet basic representation of takoyaki. I can’t recommend it for everyday snacking. Though on an anime night or some Splatoon sessions then you got yourself a plan. Just go easy on them. They fill you up fast and seafood can always make a person a touch urpy. Ofcourse you can always buy one of those little cookers and make it yourself. Just maybe try these first so you know what it is supposed to taste like.

Today’s tasty treat was provided by readers like you. Last month’s Patreon funds went to buying a nice little assortment of Japanese frozen foods to try out and see if there might be something special in the frozen section of a foreign country. So far it’s on par with how american frozen meals are. About 70% as good as the real deal, but 50% cheaper, and 100% more convenient. If you’d like to see more random foods from around the world get graded on their couch snackability consider joining our Patreon at

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